Voluptuous... I'll pass

I have seen things like big women embracing their "curves" and even those who want to get bigger just to get a bigger butt. It saddens me because, I think the reason they feel this way s because they have not found something that works for them. For a long time (and even now), I was not satisfied with myself at a bigger weight. Maybe these women can feel happy about their weight, but not me. As for the curves, they are still there even after weight loss. I know... it's a contradiction considering I put myself in that position in the first place. But I also know that food plays a big part in my lineage. If someone had a baby, birthday, funeral, new job, promotion, graduated, or even LOST WEIGHT, it was a eating party. Yes, an eating party! If the only game you play is cards, then eating, what else is there to do? This was the way I was brought up and looking back, that was a sick time.

But since I am an adult, I can change myself. It won't be easy but one day at a time, I'll make it! It's in the works. The seeds have been planted and now they are taking root. The numbers are important but not the main focus. I do have a lot to lose but I'm taking it one day at a time. As long as I know that I'm not going backwards, I'll be okay. But I do pray for those women because health problems arise from being bigger than they expected. I can't hate on them but I do wish them luck in their ventures. I got to do what I got to do for myself.